I write this blog because I am currently in Vancouver watching my son swim in the Special Olympics Canada Summer games and he is doing so incredibly well. Obviously, I am very proud of his accomplishments and of the young man he has grown up to become. What I am pondering is how much I committed to myself and others to get done in between sessions and in the evenings even though I am supposed to be on vacation.
When did I become superwoman? At what age did I suddenly become endowed with superhuman strength and mental agility beyond a normal human being that I can juggle many activities at the same time? Since when did I desire a statue of myself in the town square for everyone to admire and remember how incredibly amazing I was in giving myself over to extraordinary wisdom?
As I ponder these questions, I stunningly realize that I forgot to order the statue! When did that fall off my to-do list? Where is that list anyways? Surely it has to be in my pile of other lists...
How many of us out there have forgotten to order the statue? (I actually would like to know how many of you out there actually DID order the statue!) At the end of the day, do the to-do lists really matter? Does it matter that the dishes didn't get done? Does it matter that the house is not spotless? Does it matter that you did not pick up the phone at the end of your work day but instead, let it go to voicemail? In most normal, every day circumstances, no it does not matter. There will always be work to be done, cleaning, laundry, organizing, meetings...these will always exist but how about the relationship with people around you? How about the most important relationship of all...the one with yourself? Are those high on your to-do list?
I have been meeting a lot of people lately who are in relationship crisis with themselves and this is being projected out on others around them. That argument you had with your spouse the other day...what was that really about? It certainly wasn't about them...it was all about you projecting onto them and them projecting on to you. It matters not who started it, what matters is how people engage in arguments. Are you able to see arguments for what they really are? A cry for help and attention.
How about imbalances? What are they a sign of? How about the need to control? How about the need to stay busy so you don't have to be with yourself? Or how about the plain old need to just have a check list so that at the end of the day you can say you accomplished something and changed the world just a little bit at a time? Whatever the reason, when life is imbalanced, it is important to acknowledge you have taken on too much and now, you desire to trim those activities back and get into the state of nothingness where magic happens because you are able to reconnect with who you truly are.
Do I dare tell you that while writing this blog, I reset the imbalance I was experiencing and actually napped for 90 minutes, watched David compete and win 2 gold medals and ate some nutritional food? Yup, I did that. So while this blog may take you a few minutes to read, it actually took me 8 hours to write.
Reset the imbalance. Rewrite your to-do list and put yourself first. You are worth it.